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The Privilege of Grandparents

March 27, 2021

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 'You play a crucial role in the life and choices of your grandchild."

- Allen Hunt, Dreams for your Grandchild

Watching your parents age is a privilege, but it also comes with a bit of sadness... sadness realizing how fast time is passing by. As our babies grow, we beg for time to slow down, but we also wish the same thing for our parents.

It's a blessing when your kids and your parents get to spend time together. It's a grandparents job to spoil them endlessly! You know the saying, "what happens at Grandma's house stays at Grandma's house!". 

Your parents impact families for generations. Most of the traditions your family celebrates today were probably passed down from them. Your kids will remember the holiday decorations your mom had each year and that the good china dishes came out at Easter. 

They pass on fading hobbies like knitting, crocheting, or quilting. Watching your kids spend time with your mom learn those skills is precious. Home made anything in the kitchen these days takes a back seat to the rush of life with young kids. Grandkids will learn the recipes that call for "just a pinch" of this and a "dollop of that" -- those old recipes written on yellowing index cards in Grandma's handwriting... and they'll remember that she would sneak them one more cookie even after mom said no. 

Grandparents often live a slower life.  They've already "been there, done that" with carpools and being PTO moms.  They usually add the slower pace and appreciation of a good game of cards and reading an actual book! Kids learn to appreciate the music of an older generation, Grampa's love of collecting stamp or coins, building model trains, and telling the best corny jokes? Family history and all of its stories are shared. Grandparents are the history books. There is a special bond shared between these generations.

Mama, you are the keeper of the family memories until you can pass them to your kids when they are grown.  Make sure you have the images that take your kids right back to grandma's kitchen and the smell of chicken and dumplings simmering on the stove, the details of the garage where Grampa fixes the lawnmower (because he will never take it to the shop because he can fix it himself!), the pictures on the walls of their house, the colors of their curtains, their furniture, the backyard swing, the bedroom the kids slept in each time they visited? Images that help you remember all the fun times you spent together picking blueberries and of Grampa snoozing in his favorite chair. Those details fill the senses and hearts with memories your kids will keep forever.

Time is not slowing down and often is not a friend.  My family is watching my dad struggle with dementia and the hobbies and skills he taught me can no longer be passed on through him. The stories of his life are not as numerous any more as they fade from his memory but it makes the time my kids spend with him now even more  precious.  They see the fragility of life and appreciate it even more.

One of the first things we look for after losing someone are photos. That's the physical thing to remind us of the intangible things that are left behind. Please take and PRINT the photos that will fill your house with the, "do you remember when....." conversations every time they are shared.  

Whether it's your kids growing up or your parents growing older, don't have regrets of not having photos showing the love and relationships between your parents and their grandkids. Document the details of every day.  The routines might seem mundane or unimportant but those are the moments that make their lives so rich in ways outside of wealth.  The photos will be a link back in time and will be one of your family treasures.

Make sure you are in those photos too mom!  You are also creating the story of YOU that your kids will pass on to theirs. Don't wait any longer and have to live with the what-if's and should-of's of regret.  Let's plan a Storytelling Session with your parents today.

Hugs,

Jennifer Crow

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